More Change?

I remember when Dash turned one and the hints started trickling in…”so when are you having #2?” “Going to try for a girl the second time?” Nudge, nudge, wink, wink, elbows in the ribs. I always hated it.

With Jack Jack turning one I haven’t had any sly questions or little winks. And the irony is that I’ve been wanting another baby since he was oh probably 4 months old. Maybe something to do with my newly discovered mothering instincts or with the sheerly sweet baby that our little lovebug has been. So with Jack Jack’s milestone birthday behind us, our thoughts have quite naturally turned to “what’s next”? Who does God want to be part of our family next?

As you my faithful readers know, it was a journey (to put it simply) with my first two pregnancies. And yet, we don’t feel “done”… we both feel our hearts wide open for more babies in our family.

So we’ve been thinking about how we could help a child that needs a home and make our own home feel complete at the same time. We started researching adoption. Just as before, the cost is insurmountable for us. Stumped, I just put all decisions on hold for a time.

And then a bulletin announcement at church caught my eye. “Come to an information meeting at [another local church] about being a foster parent”. Something stirred inside of me. A dream. The dream that Mr. Incredible and I have tossed back and forth since before we were married. To foster, to adopt, to open our home someday to children in need. And I thought–“why not check it out?” I had never thought about domestic, local adoption, but yet, why not? A couple friends came with me and I sat completely inspired throughout the informational seminar. Similar to how I felt in my old social work classes in college and grad school—my heart beating fast, excitement lurching me forward. Mr. Incredible and I talked long into the night about it that night and the next day I picked up the phone.

The program we have applied for through our state is called “fost-adopt”. The organization is looking for families who will pick up newborns directly from the hospital and foster them. Most commonly, these babies are born drug-addicted and in about 80% of cases parental rights are severed. Foster parents are given a stipend for the baby’s care, as well as diapers, formula, and clothing. If and when the baby is freed for adoption, we would have first “dibs” (provided no other family for the baby has stepped forward).

So what are our next steps?

• 1. Paperwork—completed and submitted
• 2.Initial home visit to determine suitability—completed yesterday morning
• 3. Social worker assigned and meeting scheduled
• 4. 30 hours of training for each parent
• 5. background checks, references called, second home visit
• 6. state licensing home visit
• 7. waiting list!

I imagine the entire process will take a minimum of 6-9 months. We’re not in a rush and it will take us awhile to complete the training. I also don’t want to jump into anything so major so soon after leaving NH. I am purposely slowing life down, so adding a newborn in to the mix isn’t exactly the cornerstone of a slow-paced life. We’re just exploring our options, and slowly getting this process started.

I can’t wait, though. This new baby may only be in our life for a season, or he/she may become part of our forever family, but either way we’ll positively impact him/her in their most formative early years, and I KNOW that this is something God has laid on our hearts. We told Dash that we were going to be talking to a lady about how we could help a baby in our house who didn’t have a mommy or a daddy right now to help take care of him or her. He was intrigued and asked a lot of questions, but said nothing further. When the home visit was almost over yesterday, Dash suddenly and sweetly asked the social worker: “can you please bring me a sister?”